It's GOP Debate Day!

20 Things We Want to See at Tonight's GOP Debate; Plus, DEBATE BINGO CARDS!!!

Sep 27, 2023

That’s right PurpleAmericans! Today is yet another opportunity to see the demolition derby that is the GOP Primary Debates (minus the current frontrunner). If you want to read our most recent recap on the state of the race, you can read it here. For the most part, these also rans are basically running to be #2, which has a history of being the “next one up” in the next nominating contest four or eight years later. Look at George H.W. Bush, McCain, Romney as examples. The GOP tends to fall in line with whoever is next, and whoever finishes a strong #2 here should have the leg up in 2028.

They took it relatively easy on each other in the first go ‘round, instead taking the opportunity to introduce themselves to the GOP voters and the American electorate. Tonight, expect some knives to come out as they start to elbow each other out for position.

In light of that, here are 20 things we want to see tonight as they go at it.

Nikki Haley had some of the best responses at the first debate. She looked calm, in command of facts, and frankly like the only adult in the room. She was forceful with her positions and graceful in her manner. PLEASE, more of that. Believe it or not, it’s actually what voters want.
Someone please put Vivek Ramaswamy in his place. I’m already tired of his schtick.
Christie, continue to hack away at Trump and his record. You’ll continue to get booed, but the audience at home loves it.
Borgum, please take a 5 hour energy or something. Show some energy.
I want to see a side by side comparison between Mike Pence giving a statement and a response by Sam the Eagle from the Muppets. My hunch is that it would look identical.
I want to see a “Woke-O-Meter” in the bottom corner that dings every time one of the candidates says the word “woke.” There should be a separate one singularly tracking DeSantis as the worst offender.
Moderators, please play the whole video to “Rich Men North of Richmond.” It was kind of ham-handed the way you played a clip in the last debate and the roundabout way you tried to insert it into a question, which really was kind of more of a non sequitur. The thing is, the fifteen second clip of Oliver Anthony was the best part of the last debate and it just went downhill from there.
Tim Scott, please show some spontaneity and say something that isn’t just a memorized talking point.
I’d love to see a live feed of Trump laughing his ass off at some of the responses by these clowns. Then I would love to see the look on his face as Christie lands a particularly harsh body blow directly on the orange one.
Moderators, ask every candidate:
1. Should the U.S. continue to support Ukraine? NATO?
2. Should the U.S. default on our debts?
3. Should the U.S. Government be shutdown this week?
4. Should Biden be Impeached?
5. Is Mike Milley a Patriot or as Trump says, a Traitor?
6. Is Trump guilty of ANY of the things for which he was indicted? Which ones?
Oh and as long as I’ve got the moderators’ attention, some fact checking would be nice.
Whenever DeSantis tries to use his record in Florida as a talking point, I want one of the other candidates, any of the other candidates really, to point out that Florida has become a wreck since DeSantis took over.
I want to see someone use the Menendez indictments to go after Christie, and the fact that 65% of voters in New Jersey think every elected official there is corrupt, and DON’T CARE ABOUT IT.
I want to see Haley give Vivek a good spanking. He was getting on everyone’s nerves at the last debate with mistruths and stupid answers, but it seemed Haley cringed the most and was the antithesis of that. I want to see Haley metaphorically beat the snot out of the smug nobody.
Is Doug Borgum still standing at this point? Has he fallen asleep? Let’s go to a reaction shot.
How many questions in do you think they’ll go without asking a question on the southern border? I put the over/under at 2.
I want to see Biden place an ad right in the middle of the debate where he goes “You think I’m worried about any of these clowns?”
I want to see the Bulwark-ers responses like last time. Are you listening Sarah Longwell, Tim Miller, J.V. Last? :)
I want a soundbite from this debate to be making the rounds on all the morning television news shows on Thursday. Something that gets a huge response from the audience and closes the door hard on someone, preferably DeSantis or Vivek.
I want to see an alternative to Trump emerge. It won’t happen immediately, but the sooner it gets down to one alternative, the better the chances Trump doesn’t win the GOP nomination and just withers away in Mar-a-lago untill he goes to Suffolk Minimum Security Prison for the rest of his days.