The Cost of How We Talk About Politics

When Everything is an Existential Threat, Bad Things Happen

The city of Duluth, MN has been grieving the past few weeks. A man, who had had mental health issues, shot his wife and son, and then murdered his ex and his son with her, the youngest being only seven years old. He then turned the gun on himself.

The man was a deeply disturbed individual. Earlier this year, he had held a knife to someone’s throat. The police report has the name of the individual redacted, but he did tell the responding officer that he had been diagnosed with schizophrenia within the past five years, and that he had recently changed medications. He also commented about how the russians had control of his mind since he was a young boy. He had admitted to attempting suicide within the last year and a half. Clearly, he was not a very stable person and had some deep seeded mental health issues.

So why am I talking about this murder here. Well, there are two reasons.

First is, I knew one of the victims, sort of. I graduated high school with her brother who I had known since I was 12, and she was a few years behind us in school. After finding out about the murders, I wish I had known her better; it’s heatbreaking for me to think about. My heart goes out to her brother Chris and her family.¹

But the second reason is because what seemed to have triggered him to commit these murders was the election of Trump. In that same police report from earlier this year, he said to the officer that if Trump took over “[M]ake sure to put a bullet in [the murderer’s] head and his family’s.”

Now, before I get a lot of hate mail about this, let me just be clear:

• Donald Trump, nor the election of Donald Trump caused these murders. Clearly the man had troubles that go way beyond this election. The murderer alone is responsible for these horrific events.

• This person needed psychiactric help, and without it he was a ticking time bomb. That has nothing to do with politics whatsoever.

But what I want to focus on here, today, is HOW we talk about politics and our rhetoric. Both Democrats and Republicans had framed this past election as one of existential importance. If the wrong side won it was going to cause a catastrophe that would result in the complete collapse of the United States! Trump was either the second coming of Jesus or the Antichrist depending on who you talked to. Elections in the past were really divisive, but this one the rhetoric was considerably hot. I was even guilty of it too to a degree at times.

But what happens when out rhetoric spirals out of control into the ears of people who can’t process the hyperbole as just that? You get statements like these, which the murderer posted over the past months, and which many of you out there no doubt also saw in various forms.

I know many others out there feel that way too. That Trump was an existential threat to America, to many different identity groups, to our way of life, hell, to everything Americans hold dear. It’s been pounded into all of brains now over and over again for the past 9 years. Venture onto social media and you can get a 24/7/365 bombardment of this kind of stuff. To many, he’s Hitler reincarnated. When the depiction is placed in such a dark way, and then Trump wins, yeah, that can lead many people into a very dark place indeed. I personally know many people who are still in a funk about the election and genuinely feel that the dawn will never come. However, the great thing about America is that we DO have elections, and we DO have institutions and we DO have a strong foundation where in time we will have an opportunity to course correct.

I do believe we have to dial down the rhetoric some (OK, a LOT). For many of us, we recognize it as hyperbole. But for many, including young people, those with mental health issues and others who don’t follow politics regularly, they take it much more literally, with much darker consequences. Just look at the list of events that have drawn out some serious political violence and the warning signs are all around us:

• Steve Scalise shot.

• Nancy Pelosi’s husband beat over the head by a hammer.

• Another event at Pelosi’s house involved a trespasser to the property when she wasn’t there.

• Trump was shot.

• Another person was in the process of attempting to shoot Trump when Secret Service intervened.

• Cesar Sayoc, a MAGA adherent, mailed more than a dozen pipe bombs to Democratic officials.

• And then of course there was the January 6th Insurrection.

That many of the events above were perpetrated by people with severe mental issues should not be lost on anyone. I fear for many, they will continue with this heated rhetoric until someone closer to them is personally impacted. That is already too late. We can discuss politics, we can maintain decorum and still have a level of debate, without going too far, and we all recognize where too far is. We’ve been living in it for too long. So I am personally asking everyone to tone it down a tad. It’s not “sanewashing” or “normalizing”, it’s treating serious issues more literally and with less colorful metaphors that can be so easily misconstrued by those who don’t understand them.

Do I wish Trump had won? Absolutely Not. But I’m not going to dwell on it either with a chip on my shoulder; I’m going to adapt to the new reality and continue with what I’ve always done, not crawl into a ball for four years waiting for it to be over. For many though, that’s how they view it. When you look at things so starkly and so dire, you can’t quite process how dark the world has become.

And before I conclude here, let me just say that if you are feeling that way, and you aren’t turning the page, there are always people who will listen and help you through it. Find some help. Depression is tough but it doesn’t have to be forever. And if you’re feeling suicidal, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline (988 on your phone) and talk to someone. Don’t let a bad day become something worse.

PurpleAmerica’s Cultural Corner

I feel it necessary to comment on our gun culture too. People are always talking about universal background checks and more mental health funding. The murderer here, despite having a long history of mental health issues that should be red flags against purchasing a firearm, was able to purchase a gun weeks before the murders.

No, he should not have had a gun.

No, the gun shop owner should not have been able to provide one to him.

No, we do not need guns to be so readily accessible.

Our gun laws are already the worst in the world and that is because we actually don’t have very many of them. But those that we do have we expect to be enforced. Had the people in charge done their jobs here, tragedy may have been averted. That this occured is heartbreaking because it was 100% preventable with the laws we already have.

PurpleAmerica’s Obscure Fact of the Day

Something that many have not had to directly deal with, unless they’ve had something sudden and tragic happen, are the costs associated with events such as this. For many aging people, they are able to plan ahead and cover many expenses, but when it happens suddenly it really puts a strain on the families, many of whom often are already just trying to make ends meet, and still dealing with the sudden shock of the event that happened to cause this.

The families of the victims here have started a GoFundMe page to help cover the funeral and legal costs, of which there are a lot. Please consider a small donation if you can.

I’m so sorry Erin. I wish I knew you and your son better. R.I.P.

And for Kathryn and Oliver’s family, my sincerest condolences. (I am currently not aware of a GoFundMe page, but if anyone knows, please let me know and I’ll link to it).

PurpleAmerica’s Final Word on the Subject

Erin Potratz, 47

Jacob Nephew, 15

Kathryn Ramsland, 45

Oliver Nephew, 7

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits have been damaged.”— Psalms, 34:18

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Footnotes and Fun Stuff

1. I recently found out from another friend from Duluth that she graduated with the other victim as well. It can be a small world sometime. My heart goes out to everyone who knew any of the victims, as well as anyone else who knows someone who has died this tragically. It really is painful.